The Divine Ms Em

The Fu Manchu- Pet Styles to Make You Smile

The Fu Manchu is technically the Miki breed “show” cut. What exactly is a Miki, you ask? Personally I believe it’s a Guinea pig with long hair and a hefty price tag. However if you ask Miki owners and breeders it’s either an ancient breed from Thailand or a concoction of breeder by the name of Micki Mackin in the late 1980’s.Whatever their origins be, when grooming these little 3 lb fur balls a smile always comes across my face. How can you not smirk when giving a Kung Fu hairstyle

The Fu Manchu does not need apply only to Miki. I have used it on shih tzu and yorkie type dogs that either the parents want something unique or the dog has a matted face. The hairstyle is fairly simple to achieve.

First the feet are cleaned in the same manner as one does with a poodle. I normally use a #10 on my Miki feet, but a #15 or a 5/8 toe would be fabulous as well. If doing it for a true Miki fanatic DO NOT shave the sanitary. For some unknown reason if a Miki is going the be shown then sanitary may not be shaved. Apparently dingle berries add to the confirmation of the animal.

After the feet have been properly shaved, I move to the head area. I have used everything for a #7 with the grain, a #7 rev or a #10 with the grain to achieve the look. It truly depends on owner preference. Also, take into account the coloring of the dog. If it is a white or apricot you may want to go with the #7 with the grain or a longer blade so that the head skin doesn’t appear too pink.

 

The head is very similar to a schnauzer. The trim goes from the area right in front of the eye back towards the body. The neck area is made into a V and stops right at the back of the ear. The top of the head is trimmed to the occiput. Leave the ears, beard and mustache.

The rest of the body is left flowing and long. If the owner is having trouble keeping the hair properly combed out you can de-bulk the coat with thinning shears

 

 

 

Stuffed Sausage

    Happy Thanksgiving to all my comrades in grooming!  Since today is all about family and tradition, I found it only fitting to share one of my favorite family tales with all of you today.  Like most great family stories, this one is always told after a few gin and tonics and a good helping of Laurence Welk, by my paternal grandfather.  My mother of course is in the corner,hand firmly planted on her forehead and silently doing hail Marys that nothing too "colorful" issues from his mouth in front of company.

    This tale, from what I can gather occurred sometimein the 50 or 60, on Thanksgiving.  Remember this is from a very well pickled narrator who like most grandparents likes to make everything "walking barefoot 3 miles in the snow both ways," if you get my drift.  Both my grandmother and him were planning a huge party for the occasion.  The guest list was well over 50, and included not only family and friends, but important co-workers from my grandfather's workplace.  They were running around the kitchen like chickens with their heads cut off.  Of course the large amount of guests dictated an equally monumental bird.  From pictures of this massive gobbler (this is the same year that my father and the turkey shared the same weight so a picture of the two side by side was a must for future embarrassment :)) I estimate it was close to15lbs...easy.

    Amoungst all the chaos of preparing for the party of the century was the family dog, Tanbark.  Tanbark was a chestnut dachshund and from all accounts basically a grouchy old man trapped in a dog's body.  He loved his family, but darn sure was going to let them know when things did not met his expectations from his throne/bed by the fireplace.  He was one of those dogs you couldn't help loving, but often questioned why?

    With Tanbark, annoyed by all the bustling, resting on his pillow, my grandmother started to set the food out on the back veranda dinning table.  She figured the guests would enjoy the beautiful weather and view of the downtown Ashland, KY and the Ohio river.  With the holiday spread laid out, she then turned her attention to greeting her guests.  As the guests arrived, the liquor began to flow and needless to say everyone was getting toasty and hungry. 

    Seeing that everyone's mouth's were salivating for this delicious feast, my grandfather made his way outside to start carving up his prized bird.  However, as he reached the veranda, a cacophony of expletives began to spew from his mouth.  There lying on top of the table, legs sprawled in all directions and unable to move was Tanbark and the remnants of the Thanksgiving feast.  The dachshund had devoured the 15lb turkey along with all the sides, with a pack full of guests in the main house.  How my grandfather let they dog leave with his life that day we never know!  I'm sure the thought of serving dachshund did cross his mind. Of course, the feast was ruined and they made due with whatever was in pantry.  Thank heavens for free flowing liquid dinner that curbed some of the disappointment. 

    Tanbark did live through his gorging unscathed.  Although, I've been told he was not fed for a few days after since he had rendered himself immobile from his gluttony.  So now each Thanksgiving when  we are stuffed to capacity we dwell on old Tanbark and sympathize with his plight.  Happy Thanksgiving!!

The Merengue - Pet Styles to Make you Smile PT 3

Poodles can be our best friend or our worst enemy. The are time consuming and there are so many patterns and styles that sometimes it can be daunting. However, no pattern is set in stone when pertaining to pets. In fact I like to mix pieces of each up and create something new, fun and functional for my clients.

The Merengue, as I dubbed it, is basically a shortened version of a New Yorker style pattern. The face and feet are cleaned with either a #10 or #15 blade. Then depending on owner preference the neck is shaved from the base of the skull to where it meets the body with whatever length you decided for the feet and face. If you want a little flavor, the base of the skull can be left with a V to form the back of the topknot. Shave the base of the tail as well with the same blade. I normally use two fingers at the base of the tail to determine how far to shave.

Once the desired areas have been shaved, take a comb attachment to the body. I like for pets anything from a #2 comb to a #0. This allows for some fluff , but not enough to matt easily. Leave the legs un– clipped. The reason the body is trimmed prior to placing the band, is so that when you go to shave in the band it’s easier to make straight lines. An abundance of coat can present a visual challenge and bog down a clipper, so it’s best de-bulk prior to placement.

With the body clipped to desired length, we then place the band from the last rib to the area just in front of the tuck up. Use the same blade as the face and feet. Try to make it as straight as possible with the clippers, but . then refine with scissors.

Of course this would not be a poodle without ample scissoring! This is where your skills as a groomer can be showcased. Since the legs were left during the clipper work, the must be scissored and blended into the pattern. Obviously the fuller the leg the more upkeep is required by the owner, so take that into account when determining the look desired. Bellbottoms can be a nice compromise since majority of the coat length is shorter, but still has a little pizzazz with the flare.

Other variations of this trim would be to shave the ears (great for pets that either have siblings that chew their ears or tend to matt them up), remove the body band or opt not to shave the neck. Essentially have fun and smile!

Why’s Everybody Picking on Me!- Pet Styles to Make You Smile PT 2

 

While I love hand stripping and believe it is truly a lost art, sometimes it just isn’t lucrative or feasible to do a full hand strip job on a pet. That’s when it’s best to use a mixture of techniques to achieve the look of hours work. With these two Jack Russell terriers I do just that.

The rough coated male is groomed using clippers, thinning shears and hand plucking. First his coat is clipped with a 2 comb and his ears are shaved with a #10 blade. Then the coat is carded with a de-shed tool. The face is then plucked by hand using ear powder to enhance grip. To get the final perfect shape, I then thinning shear the entire dogs outline and any other stray facial hairs.

To beautify his broken coated sister, the majority of the work is done BEFORE the bath. Dirty hair is much easier to pluck and card, so I opt to make my life easier and pluck first. Many of the same tools used on the rough coated jack are employed with the broken one. Initially the coat is carded with a de-shed tool to remove the bulk. Then I go back with a stripping knife and some hand plucking. Just like her brother, she is finished by shaping up with a thinning shear.

Presto! Two adorable terriers with that perfect scruffy look in half the time. Another hint to keep their coat in proper shape and make pluck easier is to skip the conditioner when bathing. Instead opt for a good general cleansing or texturing shampoo. If the coat is still too soft, Davis make a fabulous Rough Out spray that can work wonders.

 

The Ottoman- Pet Styles to Make You Smile PT 1

Recently I was in Dallas teaching seminars and attending the Pet Pro classic.  The show was a real blast!  While at the show I did a small little platform demo on essentially how I tackle messy but neat pet styles.  Afterwards, a groomer came up to me and said "Thank god  Someone who's speaking my language!"  This little comment really struck home with me.  I had been working on a special book for quite sometime now on fun and funky pet trims and completely understood how she felt.  So I've decided rather than compile and print a book that won't reach nearly as many as the almighty Facebook, to post pages of it here on the FDG blog so that as pet groomers we don't have to feel all alone.  Below is WHY I wrote on this topic and the first "Pet Style to Make You Smile!"

 

The concept of this book was born of a pet peeve.  Every year I’d attend several grooming expos or dog shows and with each one attended the same slight sense of disappointment would arise.  These venues were full of amazing groomers primping and scissoring equally amazing animals.  Their Bischons were ice white, full coated and appeared to have never had a good roll in the mud their entire life.  The Maltese were flowing with no tangles to be found, and came with their own personal assistant to comb them at the first sight of an out of place hair. 

 

While I did leave each experience with some great new tips or concepts, these were not the dogs I deal with daily as a “pet groomer.”  My clients play in the grass, they have little kids that brush them with Barbie brushes and may not see the sight of a comb in-between my visits.  These are pets and loved members of a family, not show pieces that spend most of their lives wrapped and sprayed.  I’m a proud pet groomer and love my profession, so it stung a little to find that the pet groomer who’s work is equally amazing and valued was not being showcased or taught.

 

Thus this book was born.  Proud Pet Groomer is designed to be a fun, feel good guide to some common and some unusual pet styles.  While I consider myself a professional and take great pride in my work, one still has to take time to smile and laugh a little.  This book does just that.  Whether I have to shave a lab naked or create a long flowing do , I still want to smile, enjoy my profession and put out a well executed product.  I hope this book speaks to my fellow pet groomers, because we truly are the backbone of this industry.

The Ottoman-

 

 

Whether by odd client request or necessity, “The Ottoman” is a trim where the leg coat length is taken significantly shorter than the rest of the body.  The result is a dog that resembles a foot stool. 

The above pet is done with clean feet, a 2 comb on the legs and a D comb on the remainder of the body.  Yes, I cringe each time mom describes her vision for her little Billie boy.  The request is due to his love of the garden and bringing half of it back with him into the house.   So despite my misgivings, I attempt to not only make mom happy, but produce a presentable product. 

Obviously, this trick can come in handy when a pet comes in that is matted primarily on the extremities and the parent’s adamant that the dog not be shaved.  The key to making this unique do presentable is blending.  I stop the shorter length a good inch or two before it joins the body.  This allows me enough are to go back with my

 thinning shears and blend.  If you have chunkers or a thinning shear with less than 48 teeth this a a perfect place to use it.  It allows you take the bulk off, then follow up with your 48 teeth plus thinners to refine the shape .

 

 

Anal Retentive Groomer

Hello, my name it Emily Rupe and I'm an anal retentive groomer.  I've always suffered from this NEED to have all my ducks in a row and doubt there is any cure.  Recognizing I have a "condition" I've decided to share my disorder in hopes of helping others.

Each year it's the same, around Sept/Oct I create a chart.  This manifestation of my disease is 8 rows (representing 8wks of scheduling) and 5 columns (each day of my work week). I print off 2 copies, one I fill in with my current reoccuring cleints, the other chart I use to layout my schedule for next year.  Armed with my charts I go through and re-vamp my schedule.  I make one day for odd weekers, so that my 3 and 5 weekers don't cause conflicts with the even weeked ones.  Another day, usually toward the beginning of the week, so that traveling to grooming shows do not hamper, I put my weekly and bi-weekers.  The rest of my clients are placed according to location and frequency.

With my new schedule mapped out, and a possible withdrawal looming...I look to further organize my files.  With great relief I turn to my actual client address book (my hard copy that goes in my planner....I have a computerized one too).  I take another hit, as I purchase a new book and then transfer the data.  I reserve my best pen for the task and focus on not making any unsightly mistakes...white out is a downer.  I add any clients I may have recently taken on and drop those who I have not serviced in the past 6 months.  Grooming notes are fixated on and updated, so that the information is as current as possible.   

I admit I have a problem, but with my clients being enablers (they encourage prompt, reliable service) I may never quit.  They demand their yearly calendars each year, lovingly placed into Christmas cards in Dec....not realizing the monster they have created.  I hope sharing by sharing my condition I bring awareness.  Thank you for your support.

Emily Rupe

Helmet Hounds

Every groomer has encountered a "helmet hound" in their career, and as some cosmic joke I dwell with one.  The love of my husband's life, Earl is a magnet for mischief.  A 6 year old boston terrier, and I do use that term loosely since he's almost 25lbs, he has a face that only my husband, clouded in his infatuation would call perfect.  Eyes going in opposite directions, Earl is Marty Feldman in a burping, farting package.  Whenever, a dog has created a mess or gotten in to some sort of dilema, no need to specify which of our three canines was the culprit.....chances are Earl was the ring leader.

He's had his head caught under my china cabinet; frequently, cajoles my preschooler to let him out to roam the neighborhood; broken into every cabinet and crevice of my home in hopes of satisfying his bottomless stomach and when he sleeps in our bed...shoves my head off my pillow and refuses to give it back unless he's allowed to spoon my skull and snore sweet nothings into my ear all night long.  Despite all this some how I still can't help but love this terrier terror.

The other day I found him lying on top of the floor AC vent.  I couldn't blame him since our Florida temperatures have been well over a 100degrees.  It's hard being a fat, lazy boston, so figured he was just using his selective listening when I called for him to go outside and he did not budge.  I yelled at him again to get his chubby behind in gear but to no avail.  Flustered, I went physically move him but found he was attached to the vent somehow.  Upon closer inspection , the cause was found.  I'm sure trying top beat the heat Earl thought he'd hog the AC and sleep on the vent, what he didn't count on was his ID tag on his collar getting wedged inbetween the tines of the vent.  Now had he not been wearing a greyhound style collar (required since in the past he's flattened his bat ears to escape unwanted situations and slipped a  collar) I would have simply snapped him free...unfortunately it wasn't going to be that simple.  In addition to trying to back Earl out of his collar, while not pulling up and causing it to tighten, he decided it was time to scream and panic. 

After several minutes of trying to settle this less than brillant and some what swine like pup, we were no closer to getting him freed.  Unwilling to cut an expensive collar just yet, I greased the pig.  I grabbed some Bag Balm( utter cream kind of like vasoline) and coaxed his bulbous head out of collar.  Instantly he turned around to face his inprisoner (the AC vent) , snorted and then peed on it.  EARL!!!!!!  So is my constant struggle with my own "helmet hound".

Poochie Sushi

 As of late I'm flooded by talk and preparation of the Apocaylpse.  My father- in law is creating a stock pile of weapons and ammo, preachers with bad hair and dimples are pleading for my soul and Oprah is no longer on in the afternoon.  I'm begining to believe panic has swept the nation.  So with all this doom and gloom swirling about, I too have made some mental preparations should things begin to decline.  I've decided that if the predictions are true and food supplies dwindle I shall become a poodle-vore.  Yes, I know the thought of eating dogs makes me shudder, but after years of grooming I've come to an astute observation.

My clients with small fluffy puppies either fall into one of two categories.  One category, the pets are spoiled beyond their wildest dreams.  They go with their masters everywhere, eat the finest doggie cusine and have never seen a flea in their lives.  The other group tends to be more akin to Victoria Secret's big sales; grooming is an annual/ semi-annual experience and should be a "bargain."   Then as if their living conditions aren't horrid enough, they seem to survive all the infections, pain and maladies for an un-godly amount of time.  These surivalist pups struggle up into their middle teens, displaying an amazing amout of fortitude.  Unfortunately, today my pair of toy poodles, both well into thier teens, fell into the bra and panties bin, and had not seen water, combs or flea preventative since the last "bargain blowout."

Now in my grooming youth, I had a folly that if I spent hours primping and saving these neglected babie's hairdos into something amazing, that their owners might be persuaded to keep up the beautiful look.  Of course, over time I came to the harsh realization that these clients, who should never even own a dog that requires regular grooming, are unlikely to change. 

 As I stared at this pair of apricot poodles, I just wanted to cry.  One was 16, blind, deaf, matted to the skin, covered in fleas and had that horrid stench of a pet that really deserved to be put to rest.  The other, 3 years younger, was about in the same condition except that instead of deafness and blindness, it had suffered with an abscessed tooth until it recently fell out.  Part of me wondered why have these poor creatures live such lengthly lives if it has to be riddle with such hardship.  Then I put all the sadness out of my mind and got down to the task of making these babies comfortable once more.

With coats, so far from humane salvage, I tore through the pelts with a#7.  In the tub I scrubbed with my miracle worker in a bottle, therodyne, and some collidal oatmeal flakes.  I figured the iodine in the therodyne might "disenfect" and promote healing from all the sores and flea irritations.  The oatmeal was required to remove the oil slick that had built up into their coats.  Once bathed, I discovered that the older pup would not tolerate drying.  She thrashed as soon as the dryer was turned on, bruised her nose and had a bowel movement.  I cleaned her up and wrapped her in a towel.  I sat there with her for a while and apologized for all she has been through.  Once calmed down again I trimmed what I could wet and made it as short as possible......she might as well be matt free for a few months, since I probably would not see her again till turkey time.

Now the younger one had potential and I could feel that slight sense of folly coming over me again.  However, as I stared at the pelts on the floor I quickly snapped out of it.  Clean face, clean feet, tight shave, tight top knot and short ears.  She too deserved to have some time "bought" for her. 

Of course, mom was unmoved when her babies returned.  Paid promptly and refused to rebook.  The typical annual/semi-annual client.  But sadly it proved my observation only too true.  That when the end of the world comes, while most of us will probably perish quickly, the ancient neglected pets shall inherit the Earth.  At least, two poodles were given a few months of salvation today.

Brave New Breed

On April 26, 1986 an event that would go down in infamy unfolded in front of a world stage.  Thousands in the Ukraine were exposed to deadly radiation as the Chernobyl Power Plant suffered a massive meltdown.  Although, only 35 immediate deaths resulted from the tragedy, thousands of humans and companion animals were exposed to deadly radiation.  Over the past decades the survivors have been prone to cancers and other illnesses borne from the exposure.  However, from the ashes of this tragedy, there has been one Phoenix; the American Cocker Spaniel.  The few specimens that survived the exposure to the radiation have endured on to mutate and evolve to form a new breed…the Chernobyl Cocker.   

Although born from the American Cocker, this new mutation tends only to resemble its original form.  Whereas the American Cocker is normally under 15in and 30 lbs this new breed is often double if not triple in size.  Obesity is frequent, with the skin being pulled as taught as possible over the animal’s body.  Due to their oversized and obese frame, the smell of urine and caked on fecal matter is common.  An immense thick coat that mats to the skin and demands semi-annual shave downs has evolved as well.  To further aid in the matting process the pet and the owners seem to have developed a natural aversion to brushes and combs.

 The Chernobyl Cocker’s adaptations are not limited to physical appearance; an entire new strategy for self defense has emerged.  The first line of defense is its massive size, which the dog uses to its advantage by refusing to stand and launching it’s full body weight if advantageous to hindering the grooming process.  In addition, the Chernobyl cocker can produce mass quantities of urine which is released when being groomed, touched or looked at in any manner that it finds less than satisfactory.  If the flood of urine does not free the cocker from its captor then next tool, projectile diarrhea is employed.  Eventually, the canine  exhausts itself and the groomer normally  relenting after a plethora of paper towels, cleaner and coddling.

Much to the distain of groomers everywhere, this new take on the original breed has been increasing in popularity in the states.  Owners often have suspect “papers” claiming the creature as the more demure American version, but do not be fooled.  The Chernobyl is often purchased at flea markets, pet stores and from road side vendors.  Buff is the most prevalent color.

As of late, I’ve been called upon to groom this developing breed quite often.  Currently, I’m the handler of two specimens.  Both get the breed standard #10 all over including ears (which are usually filled with brown discharge) and the double scrub bath to remove the offensive odors their coat tends to emit.  I’ve found that a little patience goes a long way with this massive animal.  Once the cocker becomes frustrated or nervous then all the weapons described earlier, will be deployed.  Then the groom becomes an epic tiring battle that the cocker comes out the victor and the groomers back the slain warrior.

 Since my Chernobyl clients get the standard trim, I shave before the bath (I have a specific blade I use for dirty dogs) since their coat is next to impossible to dry.  Also, tools such as a Groomer’s Helper or LIPS system are a godsend.  Once the dog has been striped a good degreaser is a must.  The radiation appears to have increased the normal oils in a cocker coat to oil slick levels.  Citrus based products tend to work the best in my findings.  The drying process can be an undertaking as well, despite the lack of coat.  I personally wrap the creature’s head in a Happy Hoodie or a towel secured with a clip.  Then spray some quick drying spray and cologne (the hair holds the fragrance better when the coat is still damp and the follicles porous).  Then once the groom is completed the tradition plea to the owners insures. Valiantly I try dispel the myth that the Chernobyl only needs its coat tended to semi-annually or when company is coming to visit.  However, most owners are not receptive and in six months the ritual starts again.

Hopefully, selective breeding will once again return the Chernobyl cocker back into the beloved American Cocker Spaniel.  For it appears to be the victim of radiation; the Yorkshire Terrier and Maltese appear to be forming new mutations as well.  So groomers stock up on your paper towels, cleaner, and canine positioning aids, it’s going to be a long battle.     

Mobile Motel

I recently have earned the title as Mi-ki groomer of greater Orlando, or so I have been told.  What is a Mi-ki you may ask?  In my opinion, it's a sweet and cute long-haired guinea pig.  However, the pair of Mi-ki breeders I groom for are adamant that they a small breed of dog.  Only about 2-3 pounds and considered very rare, these little pooches come at a hefty price tag.  Each of their puppies can sold for $3,000-$5,000 each.  So my client's concern at her recent appointment was completely understood.

Her little female had come into heat, but rather than flirt with her intended mate, she was infatuated with the neutered male.  I had to smirk!  Smart girl, wants all the fun without the complication.  I guess she'd seen the other bitch Mi-ki's who already had a litter and had decided that enjoying her cute youthful figure was the ticket.  I mean it's bad enough as a human mother dealing with effects of gravity and childbirth on our bodies.  I can't imagine having a 6 pack of saggy boobs.  Despite the humor I found in the situation, I tried to assuage my clients fears while I gathered up the 3 Mi-ki's (the bitch, stud, and the eunuch) and headed to Daisy. 

I placed the trio into the tub and proceeded to bathe. As they marinated in shampoo I decided to multi-task. First I put on some tunes, in this case some Michael Buble'.  If you don't know whom I speak of, he's basically an artist for those of us that are unwilling to come to terms that as we get older our taste in music is the same as our grandparents.  In essence he is Sinatra, Dean Martin and all those wonderful crooners in a modern, slightly attractive package.  Jamming out to my tunes, I proceeded to sanitize my surroundings and tools with my Faux Paws Clean Freak.  I just love the lavender fragrance and the sense of relaxation and calm it promotes.  Of course all this vigorious activity had made me slightly hot.  Trying to cool the van off a little, I turned off one  bank of lights, since the bulbs tend to put out a good deal of heat. 

Figuring that the kids had marinated long enough, I turned around to rise them.  As I faced the kids, a huge gasp escaped my lips.  There was the little bitch Chelsea having a pornographic moment with her stud Max.  I felt like a mom walking in on two teenagers.  But as much as I wanted the awkard moment to stop, I didn't have the heart to tell their mom that I had broken up a union that she had been hoping to achieve for days.  So I averted my eye and let them finish, but sudddenly a revelation came.  OMG!  I had set the stage for this tumble.....romantic music, calming scents and dim lights.  I had turned my mobile grooming van into a cheap motel!  All I needed was the quarter fed, vibrating bed.

Well, eventually I gained my composure, finished the grooms and took the babies back to their mother.  Of course I informed her of their hanky panky, at which she was thrilled.  "I guess you giving them a bath, was kind of like a hot tub, Hun."  This statement of course only made me feel dirtier.  Then her next words really threw me, "I guess you'll just have to come get our kids in the mood next time too."  Of course I knew she was kidding, but still being thought of as a portable bordello was unsettling.  But without missing a beat I retorted,"Well if there is a female puppy are you going to name her Daisy, since that is where she was conceived?"